You won't forget but you can forgive

I've never been good at forgiving. I rarely saw it demonstrated in my childhood and throughout life, it made very rare appearances. When things went sour, relationships deteriorated quickly.


All these years I feel like I had it wrong. I thought weak people forgave and strong people were able to cut ties and move on; never looking back or forgiving someone for hurting them. I've spent most of my life as a very passive aggressive person which is not good. But I thought that being iron tough and a hard ass demonstrated strength and tolerance.


I guess you are never too old to learn. We should strive to be wiser and aim for emotional growth. Recently, I had to dig deep to forgive someone for something that I normally would not forgive. The hurt, anger and disappoint clouded my logical thinking.

A heart in pain throbs more than a logical brain.

Here's the thing......people aren't perfect. They are going to mess up. They are going to make mistakes. And they may even do things that hurt you but it is rarely about the intent of hurting you. Shortcomings stem from our own insecurities, ignorance, flaws, faults, failures, pleas for help, etc.

Forgiveness can be the first brave step in healing. By releasing the anger, you can be open to restoration. It is naïve to think you will quickly, if you ever, forget the actions and the subsequent pain and angst caused but you can choose to forgive, accept what has happened and move forward with what IS happening.

Choosing not to forgive someone is like swallowing a bitter pill that only you can taste. How can that possibly be the best medicine for your healing?